Me

I am one of those people who constantly embarrass themselves. I have tact and grace about 80% of the time, well actually I have grace a lot less than that, maybe, on a good day, 20% of the time. The rest of the time, I am a complete mess. I say the wrong things at the wrong times or I am falling or dropping things all over the place.
Things I have learned from this, never ever call a baby 'he' or 'she' because no matter how many times I am corrected I continue to use the wrong sex! Just say lovely baby! I mean what do you expect a baby that’s dressed head to toe in blue is obviously a girl, right? Or at a wonderful bridal shower where everyone has been so thoughtful and brought you tons of gifts you're not suppose to open one you particularly like and say “We know who our friends are!" Or when you are talking to someone older than you did you know it is inappropriate to say “Now-a-days…"? Once two women were telling me about their grandchildren and I looked at one of them and said “You look to young to have grandchildren” what I didn’t realize is the other women was actually younger that the women I complemented! In my small the older women actually looked 20 years younger than the younger old looking lady. I seem to always stick my foot in my mouth.
I don’t mean to but I also embarrass my self with actions like not even realizing it but buying diet books, an exercise ball and a shirt called the slimming shirt all of the same person for Christmas, who by the way is gorgeous and doesn’t need to loose a pound! Or going to a friends house and making an absolute mess by dripping icing all over their carpet, did I say dripping? Its more like pouring! and then saying "I’m not really like this I’m really neat at my house!” It seemed as if I was saying, I go to other peoples houses to make a mess but I would never do that at my own house! I also seem you fall a lot. Did you know I fell flat on my face on one of my first dates with Rob. I really lack grace. And my new thing is dropping stuff. I am not kidding when I say I drop everything! Luckily not Aliya, yet. No joke, Rob and I went grocery shopping the other day and every other item I picked up I dropped. So, there was a clean up in isle 1 and our bread is a little oddly shaped but what are you going to do?